Maybe it goes like this:
Ring ring.
CSU: “Hi Tom. CSU here. I got a great deal for you. Swap UNT for playing us. We will pay you the low FCS level fee since you can travel by bus same day if you want to save even more and keep the gate revenue. We will let you keep the gate revenue for your home games. You know how it goes, I am simply trying to find W’s because we are under a lot of pressure to perform in the Pee12. Maybe Sawful will have you competitive by 2036 and it will be highly profitable.”
Tom: “Awesome man. I have always felt so guilty about the 2012 and 2013 seasons playing in Laramie. I also didn’t get to hang out in the Fort with my buddy Jack and then he was terminated.”
CSU: “Sending you the contract and hopefully you will have a very long career in Laramie with numerous opportunities to travel to the Fort. We really enjoy the amount of money brought in by the flocks of Wyoming fans who travel to the Fort. Our fans find it deplorable to go to Laramie so we feel this is a win win situation since us playing in Laramie doesn’t really generate any more income for you than a program like UNT.”
Tom: “Consider it a deal. I’m also open to accommodating you in the future as necessary because I know our fans love to get the hell out of Wyoming and travel to other destinations.”